Requiem For The Great Game
When I think of the past
The memories that last
Are of hope, despair
Jubilation
No laptops back then
Just paper and pen
No VAR
(An abomination)
No set piece coaches
No illegal approaches
Jean-Marc Bosman unknown
No transfer windaes
No games on Sundays
Marking your man not a zone
Chorus
Archie McPherson
Back then Paul Merson
Wouldn’t have had a look in
Now disallowed goals
Invisible fouls
Hundreds of ridiculous bookings
Verse
No Champions League
Uefa/Fifa intrigue
Wasn’t yet contemplated
Rarely you’d see
Your club on TV
When you did, you were elated
Instru
Chorus
No low or high blocks
No OPTA team talks
No Jamestown analytics
No live matches each day
No incessant replays
No hordes of pundits and critics
Verse
Sometimes, now and then
I recall way back when
The ref was the sole arbitrator
Now there’s a helluva wait
While there’s a great debate
Decision 10 minutes later
Games long ago
Often played in the snow
In the ice and knee deep in gutters
Aspirational Peles
With nascent beer bellies
The tanner ba players and the nutters
Chorus
Nowadays players all seem
To be well groomed and preened
Coiffures immaculately lacquered
What about Arthur’s “Stramashes !”
Porn star moustaches
Players permanently knackered
Outro
Many of the changes football has seen
Are unpopular if not largely hated
We’ll never see its like again
The great game’s been eviscerated
© Robin Grimmond 2025
